Sun rises in east, Pope Catholic, "Handmaid's Tale" inaccurate prediction of future

I was going to write a long post here about how the proposed HHS regulation regarding the definition of abortion is very limited in scope and wouldn't really affect anyone's ability to get birth control or IUDs, but why bother? Nothing I write here is going to convince anyone that the reason lots of people are crying "Wolf!" here is because they aren't trained to tell the difference between a wolf and a Saint Bernard, and nothing you write in reply is going to convince me that what I think is a Saint Bernard is actually a wolf.

I'd say I'm "reflecting" but isn't that just the "spiritual but not religious" way of saying "prayer?"

And in the words of someone I've forgotten (Billy Connolly?), "Saying 'I'm spiritual, but not religious' is like saying 'I'm scared of dying, but I can't be arsed to go to church.'"

Anyhow, the bar and my birthday have come and gone, and I'm doing what I customarily do at this time (well, customarily after my birthday. I hope I don't have to take the bar enough times for it to become a custom): I ask myself, "Was this The Year I Hit Rock Bottom?"

Probably not. Yes, some crummy things happened, I lived in a very unpleasant apartment, I got turned down for some jobs, I realized I'm probably never going to see that insanely hot girl who works at the Moscow Baskin-Robbins ever again. But I got a degree that could prove valuable. I lost another five pounds without even trying. I figured out which of my law school friends are probably going to remain friends for life and which are probably just going to be occasional Facebook contacts. So it looks like 2001-2002 will remain The Year I Hit Rock Bottom for now.

Next year has the potential to be The Year I Hit Rock Bottom, if I can't get a job or if I failed the bar or if I was wrong about which friends would stick with me or if the Cubs win the World Series (I need them to continue losing to validate my worldview). Otherwise, it might just be The Year I Shift Out Of Neutral.

We who are about to test salute you

The bar starts in an hour and a half. In case I don't make it… I'm leaving you a gift.

Yes, I'm letting you all have the ringtones I've created. Great gift, huh? To use them, you'll need a phone that can play MP3 ringtones and some means of transferring them to your phone from your computer, such as Bluetooth.

Now, back to listening to Swedish metal bands for inspiration.

Bar review in a nutshell

The bar starts Monday. I thought that maybe if I compiled a list of things I completely bombed on practice tests, I'd remember them more easily.

- Fuckin' well-pleaded complaint rule.
- Fuckin' unborn widow problem.
- Fuckin' short form mergers.
- Fuckin' pre-1994 common-law marriages.
- Fuckin' joint and several liability with comparative contribution.
- Fuckin' Blockburger.
- Fuckin' interlocutory appeals.
- Fuckin' shelter rule.
- Fuckin' 1 cfs per 50 acres rule.
- Fuckin' 10% rule for commercially unreasonable sales.
- Fuckin' PKPA.
- Fuckin' race-notice statutes.
- Fuckin' holdover tenancies.
- Fuckin' real estate in general.

Note that this isn't counting all the issues I spotted but decided obviously didn't apply to the case, but the question authors thought otherwise, such as "Excited utterance, my ass!" "Impracticability, my ass!" or "Legitimate expectation of privacy, my ass!"

Things you don't want to hear from your date's dad

"Don't try to take her virginity, 'cause she's given it to me."

I agree with most of what noted teen sex expert Litigious Mind has to say on this issue, except that I can see why people would have greater concern for their teen daughter's sex activities than their teen son's, considering that it's easier for boys to avoid the consequences of sex (as anyone who has ever seen a Lifetime movie can attest) (and I'm in the process of developing A Theory about Lifetime movies, but it's not quite ready for display yet).

And I have heard the psychologists talk about how a healthy father-daughter relationship leads to healthy relationships between the daughter and men later in her life. Still, it seems to me like this would be a topic better addressed in a mother-daughter chat. Most people probably do it this way, but that wouldn't be news, now would it?

Also, I wouldn't describe this article as "hella disturbing" so much as "a little odd," but then I've seen more of the Internet than Litigious has.

Because it's been too long

I have the twin horrors of moving and the bar exam coming up fast, so I'll need to take comfort in the arms of an imaginary TV girlfriend.

Now, I was never really a fan of the Gilmore Girls. The dialogue was just too snappy. I know people who could talk like the Gilmores, but only in short bursts, never at the tempo the show sustained. But I've heard that a lot of people like the show, and I've seen a few episodes. Basically, I've seen enough to know I like Liza Weil. She was entertaining and "girl next door" cute as crazy girl Paris. Also, she's left-handed, and all my real-life girlfriends to date have been lefties, so this is a good sign for me.



(Her Wikipedia page notes that she had a guest spot on Law & Order: SVU. Big deal, I think I was on SVU at one point in time. Now the spot on The Adventures of Pete & Pete, on the other hand…)

Hello Cleveland!

In case you haven't heard, here's the recently-announced primary setlist for Rock Band 2. The best songs are in bold.

AC/DC - Let There Be Rock
AFI - Girl's Not Grey
Alanis Morissette - You Oughta Know
Alice in Chains - Man in the Box
Allman Brothers - Ramblin' Man
Avenged Sevenfold - Almost Easy
Bad Company - Shooting Star
Beastie Boys - So Whatcha Want
Beck - E-Pro
Bikini Kill - Rebel Girl
Billy Idol - White Wedding Pt. I
Blondie - One Way or Another
Bob Dylan - Tangled Up in Blue
Bon Jovi - Livin' on a Prayer
Cheap Trick - Hello There
Devo - Uncontrollable Urge
Dinosaur Jr - Feel the Pain
Disturbed - Down with the Sickness
The Donnas - New Kid in School
Dream Theater - Panic Attack
Duran Duran - Hungry Like the Wolf
Elvis Costello - Pump it Up
Fleetwood Mac - Go Your Own Way
Foo Fighters - Everlong
The Go-Go's - We Got the Beat
Grateful Dead - Alabama Getaway
The Guess Who - American Woman
Guns N' Roses - Shackler's Revenge
Interpol - PDA
Jane's Addiction - Mountain Song
Jethro Tull - Aqualung
Jimmy Eat World - The Middle
Joan Jett - Bad Reputation
Journey - Anyway You Want It
Judas Priest - Painkiller
Kansas - Carry On Wayward Son
L7 - Pretend We're Dead
Lacuna Coil - Our Truth
Linkin Park - One Step Closer
Lit - My Own Worst Enemy
Lush - De-Luxe
Mastodon - Colony of Birchmen
Megadeth - Peace Sells
Metallica - Battery
Mighty Mighty Bosstones - Where'd You Go
Modest Mouse - Float On
Motörhead - Ace of Spades
The Muffs - Kids in America
Nirvana - Drain You
Norman Greenbaum - Spirit in the Sky
The Offspring - Come Out & Play (Keep 'em Seperated)
Panic at the Disco - Nine in the Afternoon
Paramore - That's What You Get
Pearl Jam - Alive
The Presidents of the United States of America - Lump
Rage Against the Machine - Testify
Ratt - Round & Round
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Give it Away
The Replacements - Alex Chilton
Rise Against - Give it All
Rush - The Trees
Silversun Pickups - Lazy Eye
The Smashing Pumpkins - Today
Social Distortion - I Was Wrong
Sonic Youth - Teenage Riot
Soundgarden - Spoonman
Squeeze - Cool for Cats
Steely Dan - Bodhitsattva
Steve Miller Band - Rock'n Me
Survivor - Eye of the Tiger
System of a Down - Chop Suey!
Talking Heads - Psycho Killer
Tenacious D - Master Exploder
Testament - Souls of Black
The Who - Pinball Wizard

If you need a name for your rock band, I suggest "Volcano Ironhand."