Get your motor runnin'

What is it about motorcycles that makes people want to make a whole bunch of movies about them? And what is it that makes the motorcycle mystique completely disappear on camera, leaving the actors looking like total dinks and the film utter crap?

I present to you three examples. Example #1 is "Knightriders," a 1981 film directed by George Romero (!) in which schmucks at a Renaissance fair joust on motorcycles. Note: The following clip contains a shirtless Ed Harris.



Example #2 is from "Megaforce," which starred Edward Mulhare (who was in the TV show "Knight Rider," so we've come full circle already). Remember, these bikes are supposed to be the latest in advanced weaponry.



Example #3 is from "Warrior of the Lost World." You can tell that this bike is high-tech because it has its own screen saver.



In fact, just about the only good motorcycle scene I can think of is the desert chase from "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade." Am I missing any?

A window into my mental state

I saw a news story today informing me that a federal prosecutor was arrested in a child sex sting operation. My first thought was...

...no, it wasn't "Paedogeddon." That was my second thought.

My first thought was, "Hey! Job opening!"

On appeal from Circuit Niner

I'm working on a moot court problem involving federal preemption of state trucking regulations, and I am sorely tempted to write it in outdated CB lingo.

"Questions presented. 1. Must a road jockey hauling a box full of heaters feed the bears?"

They never did find his body

If Hitler shaved his mustache and got a haircut, do you think you'd be able to pick him out of a crowd?

I don't think I would. Unless he was wearing his uniform in which case I would probably look at him more carefully and think, "Hmm, he looks kinda like Hitler."

It's the final votedown!

A lot of people think that Alaska governor Sarah Palin is the best-looking governor in America. But she'll be facing a challenge next year, when Duke professor Michael Munger carries the Libertarian standard for North Carolina's governor.



I will donate fifty dollars to Professor Munger's campaign if he pledges to sing "Sister Christian" at his inauguration.

EDIT: Or if he pledges to rename the governor's mansion to "Castle Greyskull."

I'm a critic now

I've written a guest review over at The Bookshelf. Drop on in and check out my thoughts on The Iron Dream, an old-fashioned, two-fisted science-fiction tale from pulp author Adolf Hitler.

Maybe the book elaborates on this

I just saw Citizen Candy Man, which features interviews with the adults who got Willy Wonka's Golden Tickets when they were kids. Violet Beauregard makes an appearance.

We know that she was rolled away to be "juiced." But neither version of the film makes it clear just how they got the juice out of her. Did she puke it up? Did it ooze out of her pores? I demand answers!