Monday, March 17, 2008

Feck, humbug

Today's the day when many Irish-Americans wear buttons that say "Kiss Me, I'm Irish."* But what can you do if, like me, you don't have any particular attachment to the Auld Sod? Try one of these slogans!

• Waltz With Me, I'm Austrian
• Headbutt Me, I'm Scottish
• Salute Me, I'm Prussian
• Cut Me Off, I'm Spanish
• Bribe Me, I'm Russian
• Offend Me, I'm French
• Zerg Rush Me, I'm Korean
• Hire Me To Design Your Space-Age Airport, I'm Finnish
• Ignore Me, I'm Lichtensteinian

*Which brings me to the issue of platonic kissing. Women on TV kiss their male friends all the time when they do nice things. I was very disappointed when I grew up and found that real-life women don't kiss you even when you do really big favors for them. Are Angelinos just more friendly than those of us in the flyover states, or is it just a cheap way to create dramatic tension?

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