Thursday, March 27, 2008

Theology break!

If you've driven from Moscow to Boise (or the other way) then you've probably seen one of these.

Make Ready The Way Of The Lord

(Frankly, in this part of Idaho, I'm surprised that the highway isn't adopted by somebody like the Anti-Sodomite Coalition. But I digress.)

Rather than just make guesses about the Assembly's beliefs (I suspected they had something to do with the End Times), I did a little research, and lo and behold, here's their web site.

According to the Assembly, there was some sort of divine typo made thousands of years ago. The real heads of the universe are a couple of guys named "Yahuweh" and "Yahushua," and it turns out that all those other names like "The Lord" and "Jesus" and "Jehovah" and so forth are actually registered trademarks of Satan. So if you think you're being pious when you pray to God, boy, you'd better look out 'cause El Diablo is intercepting all your prayers and using them to build his power and send you to hell. Oh, and you Adventists are really messed up because it turns out that Saturday is the only day that isn't the Sabbath.

So what does Yahushua want us to do? Unfortunately, his disciples corrupted all his teachings, except for the ones they didn't corrupt. I'm sure the Reverend O'Leary can tell the difference.

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